JINGLE ALL THE WAY
by Linda Campanella

Characters:
Charlie
Annabelle

Costumes:
none

Props:
ring box with engagement ring
Note: characters should be seated at a table

Annabelle: Charlie, honey, I sure appreciate all the time and energy that went into planning this night out. I know how busy you are at the ad agency writing commercials all day, so I just want to say thank you.

Charlie: Well, Annabelle, you deserve a break today.

Annabelle: I know your career means a lot to you. And I'm proud of your success. But, sweetie, you're too wrapped up in your work. I wish we could have one evening together without talking about commercials.

Charlie: Okay. Let's talk about something else.

Annabelle: Super! This restaurant you picked is so beautiful! And romantic.

Charlie: Antonio's Restauraunt features authentic Italian Cuisine at a price that won't break the bank.

Annabelle: I thought that was a wonderful dinner. How was your entree?

Charlie: Mmmm, mmmm, good. Mmmm, mmmm, good. I can't believe I ate the whole thing

Annabelle: What did you think of the breadsticks?

Charlie: They're grrrreat!

Annabelle: Charlie, I thought we agreed, no more advertising talk.

Charlie: Sorry, I'll try harder.

Annabelle: If you can't go five minutes without talking about commercials, then you must love your job more than you love me.

Charlie: That's not true.

Annabelle: I'm not so sure.

Charlie: But I like the way you make me laugh.

Annabelle: Really?

Charlie: I like the funny things you do.

Annabelle: (dreamy-eyed) Oh, Charlie!

Charlie: You've got a style that's all your own. I like the Sprite in you.

Annabelle: There you go again! I don't think I can take it any more.

Charlie: I'm doing my best. Gimme a break, gimme a break.

Annabelle: I'm serious. I'm afraid this is good-bye.

Charlie: Wait, you can't go. I have a question to ask you.

Annabelle: A question? Is this a trick?

Charlie: Silly rabbit, tricks are for kids. I really do have a very important question to ask.

Annabelle: You don't mean...the question?

(Charlie shows box)

Annabelle: Is that an engagement ring?

Charlie: It's in there. (hands her box)

Annabelle: (opens box) An actual diamond engagement ring!

Charlie: It's the real thing.

Annabelle: Are you asking me to marry you?

Charlie: That's right! You get the ring, a house in the suburbs, and Charlie! But wait, there's more! Say yes tonight and we'll throw in a set of genuine Ginsu knives!

Annabelle: I need some time to think it over.

Charlie: This offer will end without any advance notice. So don't delay, act now.

Annabelle: Then my answer is...yes.

Charlie: You mean it? Oh, what a relief it is.

Annabelle: Yes! Even though the commercial jingles drive me crazy, I can't live without you! I'll marry you, Charlie.

Charlie: Marriage to Charlie may include one or more of the following: arguments, budgets, compromise, nagging, housework, and/or laundry. Those who have been previously engaged to Charlie have reported experiencing anger, depression, irritability, and thoughts of suicide. If you experience any of these symptoms, contact your pastor and stop seeing Charlie until symptoms cease.

Annabelle: Are you trying to talk me out of it? Marriage to you sounds like a tough job.

Charlie: It's not just a job, it's an adventure.

Annabelle: Well, I don't know...

Charlie: Just do it!

Annabelle: I think I'll have to pass on this.

Charlie: What did you say?

Annabelle: I'm not going to marry you. Can you hear me now?

Charlie: No, you can't! Annabelle!

Annabelle: Sorry, Charlie. But don't get mad, get glad.(exits)

Charlie: This is the pits! (thinks a minute) Hey, that's really good. I can use it for my new deodorant commercial.(exits)

copyright 2018 by Linda Campanella and Whatsits Galore

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