If you remember the cult classic tv series The Greatest American Hero, you know that Ralph Hinkley got the super suit and all the powers that go with it, making him an effective, though unlikely super-hero. But his friend and partner FBI Agent Bill Maxwell has to fight crime the old-fashioned way. Though a mere powerless mortal, Bill has an undeniable style. His unique manner of speaking almost qualifies as a foreign language, and can be as difficult to master. For those of you who desire to learn to talk like a G-Man, Whatsits Galore presents this comprehensive guide to Fed-Speak.
| A | M | ||||
| attic | brain | make a whole chicken omelet out of that | make a big deal out of that | ||
| B | make a whole tall-in-the-saddle chicken omelet out of it | make a bigger deal out of it | |||
| back to basic training | you lose | make like Willie the Wrench | act like a mechanic | ||
| bag | arrest | making nicey on | dating | ||
| bag it | catch it | meat | perpetrator | ||
| bag o' gristle | creep | meat grinders | hired gunsels | ||
| banana case | lunatic | monkey | henchman | ||
| banana-benders | delinquents | N | |||
| barf up | reveal | no cigar | I don't believe it | ||
| beach ball | punk | noodle it | discuss it | ||
| beezer | head | O | |||
| belly-up time | death | on scramble | underway | ||
| bends my frame | bothers me | on the back deck | on the car trunk | ||
| big ones | years | on tumble-dry | in an uproar | ||
| Big Red Mean Machine | Communism | over the Great Divide | death | ||
| bing, bang, boom | quickly | over the line | unendurable | ||
| bird dog | informant | over the side | insane | ||
| blinker | blindfold | P | |||
| blues | police | package | credentials | ||
| bonehead work | brain work | paint by the numbers | standard operating procedure | ||
| bowling ball | bald man | paw | hand | ||
| bring the crane | help me up | piling up | crashing | ||
| buckled into it | adept | popped his clutch | went crazy | ||
| bug bin | insane asylum | porker | fat person | ||
| burned you | discovered your secret cover | prime your pumps | get your attention | ||
| button it up | be quiet | pull his chain | arrest him | ||
| button these guys up | arrest them | pull out | leave | ||
| C | pull the wheels up | stop for the night | |||
| cash my check | fire me | pump | heart | ||
| checked in his tent | gave up | punch a hole in his bucket and drop his worms out | stop his operation | ||
| check-in time at the funny farm | insane | punch a hole in my ticket | kill me | ||
| chug around the track | go to work | punch up your dimmer | try to understand | ||
| clean his windshield | shut him up | put a dimmer on it | stop it | ||
| cockroach | lowlife | put it in the old footlocker | put it aside | ||
| come out of the chute a little fast | begin too soon | Q | |||
| come to the party | pay attention | R | |||
| coming out of chute #3 | let's go | ram a crooked stick in...and turn it | stir things up | ||
| councillor | lawyer | rammin' around | wandering | ||
| crank | coffee | read | understand | ||
| cup of spumoni | lunatic | real yuck-o | boring | ||
| D | roast our marshmallows | burn us | |||
| dance around the edge of the pool | skirt the issue | roast this turkey | arrest this jerk | ||
| dance around the edge of the pool | skirt the issue | roll right over | do as I say instantly | ||
| deep-fry your hamburgers | kill you | rubdown from the team doctor | a pep-talk | ||
| dinky donkey | loser | rum-dum | a jerk | ||
| doesn't scan | doesn't make sense | run it past the scanner | consider the possibilities | ||
| doing the Maxwell sizzle | uncomfortably hot | run it under the scanner | check it out | ||
| double dynamite | vitally important | running thin | on a tight schedule | ||
| drain his radiator | arrest him | S | |||
| drill | plan | sandbox | desert | ||
| drop a full court press on you | intimidate you | Saturday morning kiddie program | fantasy | ||
| drop a house on him | beat him up, or stop him | sawdust in the attic | loss of memory | ||
| drop him in a deep drift | take him down | scenario | a plan | ||
| drop the hammer | shut it down | scotch it | put a stop to it | ||
| E | seesaw time | time to repay the favor | |||
| F | shipped off to count their toes | sent to the asylum | |||
| falling through space | failed | sitting on top of the ashcan | teaching remedial students | ||
| fall off the reality wagon | lose one's mind | skipped the track | became distracted | feed him marshmallows | deceive him with lies | skunge | repulsive person |
| feed you to my cat | bring you serious consequences | slam dunk | return | ||
| fire-breathing | serious | sled | non-sporty car | ||
| flamingo | flaky person | slide off the table | loose one's mind | ||
| flip-top | a jerk | slipping outside your assigned airspace | getting off the track | ||
| floating around in this fruit salad | floundering | soft in the bean | dumb | ||
| foam-the-runway operation | fiasco | soft walls | psych ward | ||
| footlocker | closet | soldiers | agents | ||
| freeze it | be quiet | spike him on the concrete | stop him | ||
| front deck | car hood | squeaky-clean | correctly done | ||
| frost your pipes | burst your bubble | state laughing academy | lunatic asylum | ||
| fry our zucchini | burn us | stay easy | relax | ||
| fuzzballs | scum | steaming one's own clams | very angry | ||
| G | step into my office | let's speak privately | |||
| game stats | personal information | stick a plug in the gas bag | shut up | ||
| garby-gorps | lowlifes | (he) stinks | (he's) dishonest | ||
| geezer freezer | retirement, or your gut | stir up some dust | get someone's attention | ||
| get frosty | toughen up | stuff him and mount him over the fireplace | stop him | ||
| getting my switchboard all lit up | piquing my interest | sweep out our own tent | solve our own problems | ||
| give the pigskin | give the most important role | T | |||
| glory guy | he who gets the choice role | take a ride on a banana boat | do something crazy | ||
| go belly up | quit | that goes in our library | remember that | ||
| got all your bats in the same bellfry | sane | through-hole | wound in which the bullet passes cleanly through the body | ||
| go tapioca | lose your nerve | tie a knot in their tail | put a crimp in their operation | ||
| go through the ringer | get beat up | tilt | stop | ||
| got some wires burning | got something underhanded going on | tipped him the black spot | put out a contract on him | ||
| graduate of the laughing academy | lunatic | tipped your mitt | revealed a secret | ||
| grounded out | there's nothing we can do | toasted tootsies | severely reprimanded | ||
| ground zero | the beginning | took a little gas | was injured slightly | ||
| H | touch-and-go | a short flight | |||
| have a story conference with | interrogate | traveling in the fast lane | heading for a breakdown | ||
| high on the yuk meter | laughable | treading water | wandering aimlessly | ||
| home stretch | finale | troops | agents | ||
| howl | a great time | twenty-five-cent | run-of-the-mill | ||
| hummer | a good pitch (in baseball) | twisted | angry | ||
| I | U | ||||
| in the bag | arrested | unscramble his eggs | restore his memory | ||
| in the basket | in custody | up my tree | pursuing me | ||
| in white water | in danger | V | |||
| J | W | ||||
| jammin' down | trying too hard | watchdog | undercover agent sent to guard you | ||
| jumped up my tree | got on my case | whackie-smackie | hit somebody | ||
| K | what's the buff? | what's the story? | |||
| L | wind blowing through your attic | you're crazy | |||
| ladyfingers | thumb cuffs | wind machine | blowhard | ||
| let's hit the yellow brick road | let's go | wing | arm | ||
| let's run the tape | explain it to me | wipe his nose | beat him up | ||
| little green guys | alien beings | wrong number | failed romance | ||
| looking down the gun barrel | in serious trouble | X | |||
| looking for a little radioactivity | seeking a clue | Y | |||
| lost your steering wheel | gone crazy | yammering | complaining | ||
| yesterday's lunch | a has-been | ||||
| yin-yangs | losers | ||||
| you can't make that fly | that won't work | ||||
| yuk | loser | ||||
| yum-yum | dumb thug | ||||
| Z |
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